Friday, July 25, 2008

Bears Hunting Scientists and Other Humans

I came acorss this story today, it is really funny. Actually I wish I was one of the scientists, I know that sounds crazy but I would much rather be doing what their doing than at work. Read the story below that I copied and tell me if you disagree.


"In what is seriously the most terrifying news story we have ever read, 30 man-eating bears are currently holding a group of Russian geologists hostage at their remote survey site. The bears, reacting to a fish shortage, began their human-hunting rampage last week, when a massive brown bear killed two of the scientists. Officials said helicopters can't fly in bad weather, forcing the geologists to remain in camp with weapons ready as 10-foot-tall bears roam around outside. The Kamchatka brown bear (pictured) is one of the world's largest bear species, weighing nearly three quarters of a ton.A spokesman for the Emergency Situations Ministry said: "The people inside are scared by the invasion of bears. The bears are hungry -- for some reason there is not enough food for them this summer." An all-terrain vehicle is on its way to the camp, where its crew will await government approval to shoot the bears.While we feel sorry for both the starving bears and the terrified humans, we can't help but wonder if this story doesn't prove that Stephen Colbert was right all along.Want to see more bloodthirsty animals?"

10 comments:

Daymonster said...

I still don't feel that bad for the dudes. If they have guns that can take down bears they should be fine.

adeclipse said...

Yeah, i'm confused by this story. I've never heard of bears just holding back and waiting to attack. Most of the time when provoked they go all or nothing after their targets.

Unky Eternal said...

If all the bears attacked at once i dont think they would be able to kill them all. I think if you shoot the biggest, most dominant looking bear in the head right away, it would scare the other bears away. Start with the biggest, then work your way down.

Daymonster said...

I had to read it again. Okay 30 bears might be tough. But if everyone has a gun.... fuck, I don't know.

That's nuts. We should change our clan name to 30 brown bears in Kamchatka that are really really fucking hungy. Or 30bbiktarrfh.

Dammer said...

I can't decide which is worse, 30 large brown bears or my itchy nose.

Also, I got an email from HotOrNot.com today telling me they added something called "Favorites" so that you will never "lost that hottie again".

locopuyo said...

Don't scratch it.

Unky Playboy said...

That would be real crazy to be trapped by those bears...I wonder how good of shots Russian geologists are...

Unky Warthog said...

Somebody should ship them a Spartan Laser to go for a multikill.

adeclipse said...

Do bears get killing frenzies?

Dammer said...

I hear they get Kill-a-russian-man-jar-o's.

Instead of a Spartan laser they should just get a herd of mongeese and warthogs. It'd be just like Animal Face-off.