Friday, May 30, 2008

Don't go to Sex and the City this Weekend!

While I think I could leave it at that and have all of you be like "Well, no shit, I wasn't planning on it anyway." I would hope not, especially with the Housewarming Partay this weekend. But, just in case any of you were going to be dragged to it, by I don't know... Wifeclipse, I have another, MORE important reason to not go.

I could win a weeks worth of delicious Chipotle burritos. A girl at work made an outrageous statement that the Sex and the City movie (SATC) would be the largest grossing movie in the first weekend of any film. Bigger than Spiderman, bigger than Pirates of the Carribean, bigger than that third, but technically the sixth Star Wars movie. I nearly spit out my Dr. Pepper at the sound of such an ludicrous claim.

I then bet her a weeks worth of Chipotle that it would not be the top grossing movie, she backpeddled a bit and we finally agreed that it would have to be in the top four movies. So it can't beat these blockbusters or I have to buy 5 Chipotle Burritos:

Title Opening Gross Date
1 Spider-Man 3 $151,116,516 5/4/2007
2 POTC: Dead Man's Chest $135,634,554 7/7/2006
3 Shrek the Third $121,629,270 5/18/2007
4 Spider-Man $114,844,116 5/3/2002

Full list can be seen here. Besides Shrek, all of these are action movies, SATC is not. All of these are rated PG-13 or lower, SATC is rated R. I think you need the little kids with their parents to make a ton of money. That's almost like an additional ticket guaranteed for every viewer.

I think I got some free burritos coming.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Kinda Funny Halo/CSI Video

Besides the fact that they call a plasma grenade a frag grenade I thought it was mildly entertaining.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

KofC Get to Know 'Em: Adeclipse [Round 2]

1. Since all our GF's have variations of our names, what would your wife's name be? We have been referring to her as Girlclipse or Wifeclipse.
I like the Wifeclipse one.

2. When will she write about Vids?
I'm sure i could get her to write about them whenever she has some free time. I'm sure she has quite a bit to say about my love of video games.

3. Post a picture of Wifeclipse.
I'll have to find a picture first. We aren't big on the whole picture taking thing. [Editor's Note: Liar.]

4. How fast do you think you could drink a boot? Would you use any specific technique? (i.e. Josey sits on his beers to get them to optimal temperature):
I'm not exactly sure what the definition of a boot is to tell you the truth. But, I will ask is there a funnel that i can poor said boot through? [Editor's Note: Watch this.]

5. What specifically interested you in KofC. I think you alluded to this before, but please be more specific. (i.e. was there any one member you thought was really lame, but emailed anyway?)
I really couldn't say what interested me in KofC. It seemed like a smaller group of people which i thought was cool, since the bigger groups never seem to play together, and don't seem to know each other.

6. Do you think their will ever be another "random convert"? Would you feel jealous or would you welcome the other one(s)? What are you saying by "random convert"?
If you're referring to another member that doesn't know everyone it's cool with me so long as they don't suck ass at CoD4 or Halo, and go like 1-32 in games.

7. Word on the street is you are a big puss, how would you get over your "myriad of injuries" to take on Josey?
Like I said, i don't use rules when I fight. If it's an object that is solid and has the possibility of cracking skulls, then it's an object I'd like to use. Really the only injury I have right now is my shoulder. I dislocated it playing soccer about a year ago, and never let it heal correctly. Also, it's not so much that I’m a puss, I just don't stop and let things rest when I'm hurt so they don't heal correctly.

8. On a scale of 0 to 1 million (1 million being a for sure thing and 0 being no chance in hell) what are the chances you will be ringing SB's doorbell for the KofC housewarming party?
Right now i'd have to say 32. I don't want to say no way, because if i drink enough, who knows where i'll show up at. [Editor's Note: So you're telling me there's a chance? Yeah!]

9. Follow up question: If not this weekend, when are you going to come to Minnesota/Iowa/Illinois and visit some KofC members?
I need to at some point. Problem is being married and planning trips right now. Maybe I'll get the chance to come up at some point. My wife has family in Chicago, in Palestine or something, and we occasionally will go up there for family reunions. Also, there are some family members in Michigan or something.

10. Why isn't Dajuicee a member of KofC?
I don't know. I keep telling him to send y'all an e-mail.

11. Also, like other noble KofC members (I think only Unky Warthog) you were a "band" kid. At the risk of sounding cliche, tell us a "band camp" story.
I was a band kid, this is true. But, I played drums so it's not as bad as it sounds. [Editor’s note: still sounds bad]. I also used to play set for a few groups, and still help to lay down tracks. As far as a band camp story goes, This one time at band camp... I don't know if i really have a story. I did send a guy home from camp because i broke his rib playing football once. That's really not that interesting though. The most interesting memories were walking in on my Cousin/roommate at camp, just going at it with different girls. Also, I caught 2 random people having sex in a dumpster.

12. Rate your perception of drinking abilities of the KofC members as well as yourself.
Everyone seems as though they're able to hold their own in drinking from the stories I’ve read. I think of my drinking abilities as being pretty good. I mean, I’m Texan, I’m German, my blood runs alcohol through it 24/7.

13. Besides, Dajuicee and your wife, is there anyone else that is aware of your membership in the KofC clan? Are you ashamed to tell people?
MyBigDumbFace knows. I don't have a ton of people that I hang out with now, being at school again and not having lived here in a while, but I talk to people sometimes randomly and get to talking about like CoD4 and I’ll tell them I’m in a clan. They can kiss my ass if they don't like it or think it's funny.

14. On your facebook page, your religious views are stated, "There is a God and Jesus rules." Do you mean like Jesus Rules!, like O’Doyle Rules! or in a different way, please elaborate.
Yeah I should have included a “!” after it. I don't view myself as being one particular denomination besides Christian. I guess since I go to Baylor I would say I’m a Baptist, but I grew up going to a Methodist Church, so who knows.

15. Unky Warthog wants to know, if you were stranded on a deserted Island and you had to be there with one KofC member and one Marvin Gaye song, what would the song be and who would be the KofC member?
I guess I’d go with the song "I Heard it Through the Grapevine". If you don't like that song, then there is something wrong with you. I guess I’d take Josey along, that way if it got really boring we could at least fight apparently.

16. Besides KofC Blog and email, what are your top 5 most visited websites?, NetFlix,, (fantasy football keeper league), and Google Video.

17. SB and Pablito are starting a band. Would you be in it and what should the name be?
Obviously I’d be in it. I love music and I figure that's what I’m going for right now with my major. The name should be something like the “Sex Pistols Revisited”, or something like that. Also, you have to include the word Featuring in it. Even if you aren't featuring anyone. It makes it sound cooler.

18. Favorite Drinking game?
Kings, or Ring of Death. Both are good games. Ring of death is really if you want to skip the fun part and just get fucked up quickly. As far as a non-card game goes, Beer pong is my favorite.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Sex and Video Games

Besides the fact that his voice gets a little annoying at the end, I think this professor does a great job of explaining the brief history of sex in video games as well as what the future brings for the genre.

Also, you can talk about the Indy movie now.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Friday. Friday. Friday!

No more talk about Indiana Jones until tomorrow, I am going to it tonight at the Imax and I don't want to know anything more. I already read something about an atomic bomb. Damn you Pablito.

Also, I heard there was some confusion on when the KofC Clubhouse Warming Party was going to be. I am sure we are all aware now it is NEXT weekend, otherwise I would be boarding a plane about this time today if it was this weekend.

Josey, as my last comment said you should send out an invite to your friends from Law School if you haven't done so yet. I don't want you to feel like their are not enough woman for you.

This is pretty sweet. A double knockout.

Even though it got some real shitty reviews, HAZE seems really interesting to me. I'll probably still buy it but that will be after I finish GTA and MGS4. Check out the trailer here.

That's about all I have for today. I am getting pretty lazy.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Calling all KofC members!

I need to find an article or a video clip of something that is one-sided on the issue of education. It could be overly optimistic citing skewed statistics or a shocking story about how dangerous today's schools are. Anything that doesn't give the whole picture of the issue, it needs to be from the last few months.

I need to write a letter to the editor or writer about how they are being ridiculous. Please post any links you find in the comments sections.

The Daymonster

Monday, May 19, 2008

Pablito Buys New Toys

This past week I decided to get myself a couple gifts because, hell, I deserve it. I know Daymonster is interested in these items so I thought maybe you other guys would be too.

1. Asus Eee PC 2G Surf

This is my new laptop. It's obviously not meant to compete with my current lappy for games, downloading crap, or writing blog posts, but it will be super handy any time I travel. You can read its specs from amazon where I bought it. Basically it has wireless internet, some usb 2.0 slots, and an sd memory card slot so it'll be great for watching movies on planes/trains and surfing the internet in public places. I foolishly thought a large screen was desirable when I bought my current laptop and it is not easy to carry around the house let alone out into the world. As you can see from the first pic, this thing is a little larger than a dvd case, about the same thickness too. The keyboard and mouse touchpad are super small, a little hard to use actually but I imagine I'll get used to it. And that dvd case leads into my second purchase...

2. Nikon D60 Camera

In going with my theme of items that are good for traveling, I got a nice Digital SLR camera yesterday. I decided a while ago that I'd like to start taking better footage of the places I travel and I wanted a camera that takes high enough quality shots that I could blow the pics up and hang them on my walls. The Nikon D60 is the second cheapest Nikon camera so it's beginner level but with lots of room for advancement as I get to know the features, or so the salesman told me. It came with two lenses, one 18-55 mm and one 55-200 mm so I've got almost all the distances I'll need covered. It came with a couple dvd's to explain everything and I watched a half hour of the first one, it's pretty boring but I'll make myself finish it sometime because I need to get my money's worth. Digital SLR's aren't cheap.

Expect some photos/posts for the next couple weekends as my brother turns 21 and we have the housewarming party, on second thought it might not be a good idea to have my camera out when I'm smashed unless I want it smashed too. Then in a month I'll go to Vienna and another as of yet unknown city so I'll take plenty of pics in these places.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Questions and Responses

Thanks to an over-whelming response to my last post, I am now posting the answers to those questions I asked. (That was sarcasm, but thanks to Unky Warthog and Pablito for the responses, I'll add more if more people answer)

Video Game Category:
1. What was your first video game you remember playing/getting?
Unky Warthog: I remember playing Super Mario 3 at my Grandma's house. Besides that, Zelda for Gameboy, and Tecmo Bowl for SNES. I may have played NES first, but I don't think I remember it.
Pablito Neal: Mario for NES.
The Daymonster: I remember playing Atari at a friends house but the first video game I remember getting was the NES for Christmas with the Super Mario/Duck Hunt combo.
DammerWillEatU: Playing – a bowling game on an Atari. Getting – Super Mario World for game boy
Adeclipse: I remember playing a golf game for the old NES, along with Duckhunt and Mario Bros. The golf game was my dad's favorite back in the day.

2. What is your favorite system of all time?
Unky Warthog: Hmm...It's gotta be 360, but not by much. For me it's really what system have I had the best memories playing, and while some of my favorite video gaming experiences have been FFVII, Madden series on PS, and Halo for XBox, my memories for 360 include Big Bumpin', Worms, Uno, Halo 3, Amped 3, and many others.
Pablito Neal: Super Nintendo, followed closely by the TI-86 calculator.
The Daymonster: Original Xbox, Halo was way too much fun for it not to be. It was a hard decision selling the PS2 for an Xbox but I think I made the right decision.
DammerWillEatU: For what it can do and the user experience the 360. I have my best video game memories by far though from the Game Boy and the Sega Genesis.
Adeclipse: My favorite system of all time was probably the N64 because I can remember hours of fun linking up with friends to play Golden Eye and games like that.

3. What is your favorite video game of all time?
Unky Warthog: Final Fantasy VII. Someday I'll go back and play it and be disappointed in the quality for so many reasons, but I'll stick with that for now. I can still hear the song...'SEPH I ROTH!...SEPH I ROTH!...'
Pablito Neal: Football Manager.
The Daymonster: Probably Halo 1, but also Timesplitters and Metal Gear Solid bring back great memories.
DammerWillEatU: This is an unfair question. You should have said “favorite shooter” or “favorite sports” etc. Oh man…..uh…….uhhhh……….it’s ridiculously common of a choice I know but Ocarina of Time holds the biggest place in my heart for far too many reasons to explain here.
Adeclipse: Favorite game of all time would have to be the old Contra for the old school Nintendo. As easy as it was to beat it was still fun to do over and over. Also, I guess Sunset Riders was an awesome game back in the day.

4. What is your favorite video game peripheral of all time?
Unky Warthog: XBox 360 Mic, N64 Rumble Pack, PS Memory Card
Pablito Neal: Rock Band Guitar.
The Daymonster: NES power pad, Track and field back then had to be one of the best games ever.
DammerWillEatU: The Sega controller we got that allowed you to program a left and right shoulder button to a combination of the other buttons. NBA Jam TE was never the same, no longer was I in a constant state of holding down the Turbo button. I could now with the push of one button punch people and steal their ball…so much more efficient than trying to press two.
Adeclipse: I feel like saying the Joystick for PC but that would be too easy to say, and I didn't play a ton of PC games back in the day. So, I guess I'd have to say I liked the old school accessory guns for House of the Dead 3 back on the gamecube.

Food and Drink Category:
5. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
Unky Warthog: It depends on the definition. If we're gonna say burger type joints, it's Arby's. If we're ordering at the counter, it's Noodles. If we go by the most broad definition, it's Pizza Hut.
Pablito Neal: Chipotle.
The Daymonster: Taco Bell, especially if I don't count what happens to my digestive system after.
DammerWillEatU: Arby’s. I’ve only been to Noodles & Company once, but I really really like it. I question whether I can call it fast food or not.
Adeclipse: Taco Bueno

6. What is your favorite non-alcoholic beverage?
Unky Warthog: Fanta Icy Lemon or Sunkist Sparkling Lemonade
Pablito Neal: Dole Pineapple Orange Banana Juice.
The Daymonster: Gatorade, I am really liking the new yellow Tiger brand stuff.
DammerWillEatU: Lemon Lime Gatorade when I am utterly dehydrated. Cherry Coke made with Grenadine is awesome too.
Adeclipse: Dr. Pepper

7. What is your least favorite food, besides broccoli?
Unky Warthog: Eggplant and mushrooms are pretty bad. I've started to like olives.
Pablito Neal: Sushi.
The Daymonster: Without a doubt zucchini and mushrooms.
DammerWillEatU: Those chocolates with the disgusting cherry filling inside.
Adeclipse: Pickles, and hey I love Broccoli.

Miscellaneous Category:
8. Which is worse getting a burp in the face or a fart in the general area?
Unky Warthog: Burp in the face for sure.
Pablito Neal: General area fart is worse.
The Daymonster: Burp in the face is 100x worse.
DammerWillEatU: Fart in the general area.
Adeclipse: Fart in the general area, but only if It's known that there was gas passed, and only if it smells horrible. Dajuicee has some horrible smelling gas. When we used to room together he could clear the room even if he was sitting on the opposite side.

9. What combination of KofC members against SB and Josey would create the fairest fight?
Unky Warthog: Wait, we have a ninja in our clan, right? No need for a combination.
Pablito Neal: Adeclipse and Dammer.
The Daymonster: Everyone else.
DammerWillEatU: Eternal and Adeclipse.
Adeclipse: Hmm, I don't know how they fight and I don't know if you're referring to RL or game wise. In RL I'd love to take a crack. I like to fight even though I don't much since high school. Hockey used to do it for me all the time. I think Dajuicee and I could put up a good fight against most people because we have decent size.

10. Would you rather have no video games for a year or no sex for a year?
Unky Warthog: At this stage in my life probably no sex for a year. No guarantees it would happen anyway.
Pablito Neal: ... no vids, but it's tough.
The Daymonster: sex, as soon as I can have sex for hours at a time with multiple people, I'll revisit my response.
DammerWillEatU: No vids.
Adeclipse: Well, I'm married so one of them is already true... Just kidding. That's a rough question. I'm going to keep my mouth closed because I don't want to even have the chance of being in trouble.

11. What is your favorite free ware online game (besides Puyo's running one)?
Unky Warthog: Snood
Pablito Neal: Sudoku.
The Daymonster: Desktop Tower Defense.
DammerWillEatU: I don’t play that many, but I did play a game called Dragonslayer quite a bit back in middle school (I think that’s what it was called).
Adeclipse: I don't know what the name of it is but you do these random Olympic Games that are all kind of crappy, but still fun.

12. Does anyone want to plan a cross country RV trip next summer to tour a bunch of ballparks?
Unky Warthog: Absolutely, as long as we do our best to catch a Braves game...and it's a booze cruise.
Pablito Neal: Possibly.
The Daymonster: It was my idea, so of course.
DammerWillEatU: Probably.
Adeclipse: I don't know about playing a cross country road trip. I also am not a fan of planning them to ball parks either. I am not a huge fan of baseball. I only get interested if the Astros or Rangers make it into playoffs.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Some Questions for KofC Members

One of my favorite features of this blog/site/clan/circle of trust is the KofC Get to Know 'Em Series. It's always good to get to know people even the ones you thought you knew. I still am a little hesitant to explain how I know Adeclipse without sounding like a total loser. (Uh, well you see, uh we met online, it's interesting because, uh well, he is from Texas and he emailed us because he saw our video game blog) usually after the "we met online" people start getting creeped out. So now when my friends asks who I am playing with I tend to say Adeclipse and Dejuicee are combat buddies from my time in Afghanistan after high school.

Anyways, I digress, I would like to take this opportunity to ask a few questions to everyone that they can respond in the comments or if you think it would be more fun, you can email me the response and I can post them all in the next post. Either way is fine with me, just let me know what you think before you start posting your answers in the comment section.

Here are the questions:

Video Game Category:
1. What was your first video game you remember playing/getting?
2. What is your favorite system of all time?
3. What is your favorite video game of all time?
4. What is your favorite video game peripheral of all time?

Food and Drink Category:
5. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
6. What is your favorite non-alcoholic beverage?
7. What is your least favorite food, besides broccoli?

Miscellaneous Category:
8. Which is worse getting a burp in the face or a fart in the general area?
9. What combination of KofC members against SB and Josey would create the fairest fight?
10. Would you rather have no video games for a year or no sex for a year?
11. What is your favorite free ware online game (besides Puyo's running one)?
12. Does anyone want to play a cross country RV trip next summer to tour a bunch of ballparks?

Monday, May 12, 2008

Happy Monday

I really didn't have that much to say today, but I just wanted to post this picture.

I do have one piece of news, I got a new TV yesterday. The 46" Sharp Aquos that everyone seems to have. I think it's gotta be the official TV of the Knights of Cydonia. I am really diggin' it and before I got it I didn't realize how shitty my old LCD was. Also I got it for about 500 less than the price listed there and I had about an additional 200 bucks off thanks to credit card points.

Dammer that's what I wanted to ask you about and why I emailed you. I wanted your opinion on the TV. I hope all the KofC mom's had a good Mother's Day and I'll be online tonight if anyone wants to shoot some digital enemies.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

I Finally Got Around to It

So remember a long time ago when I was asking for screenshots so that I could put together a line rider video? Well I finally got around to semi-finishing the damn thing. Apologies to Adeclipse and the Unkys, you didn't get into the video. I got too tired of collecting screenshots and editing. Tilla I forgot to put your name in the credits for capturing the Line Rider action with your computer, so I'll put it here and then you won't feel left out:


For heightened viewing, try to put yourself back in the context of the blog's content about 5 months ago. Enjoy everyone!

Friday, May 9, 2008

Nintendo Wii = Not as bad as you think

UPDATE: This weekend is a Team Snipers Double EXP weekend for Halo. I don't really care about EXP but I think Team Snipers might be fun. Anyone wanna play this weekend?

Let me first start by telling you, I know you all hate the Wii. It's a noob console, it's "gay", and it sucks. I get that. But you have to understand I am surrounded by girls. And not in the cool multiple sex partners way. In the I only hangout with girls as friends way.

This is why I bought a Wii. It's either play Mario Kart Wii or watch re-runs of Sex and the City.

Also, the Virtual Console is pretty sweet. I just picked up Super Mario Bros. for NES for 500 Wii points. If you are not familiar with the Wii point exchange rate these days, they are trading at a 1 Wii point to 1 cent ratio. So Mario for NES for 5 bucks isn't too bad.

Speaking of the good old Nintendo Entertainment System, you have to check out this dudes working gianormous NES controller coffee table. He has all of the steps documented here.

Make sure you check out the pictures of the house that's hosting the 1st Annual KofC Housewarming Partay.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Overdue House Post

So it's about time one of us made a post about SB's new house. He bought it about a month ago and we moved in April 28. It was an exhausting day. SB got a huge Uhaul and he and Josey moved everything from their apartment to the house and everything was packed in the living room for about a day. I met them in the afternoon, we went and emptied my storage unit, brought over my stuff, and returned the truck.

Setting up my bed was my first priority so I did that and then we worked on moving other furniture to our bedrooms, the porch, and the basement. We tried to move the big leather L couch to the basement but only succeeded in severely scratcing and marking up the stairway because the couch was just too large to fit so we left it in the living room. SB got a smaller black leather loveseat to match it, a new 52" LCD, and a nice coffee table so that room's basically set up. The dining room is empty except for a rug but a table and chairs has been ordered and should be arriving in a few weeks. The kitchen is adequate, the stove and oven are super old but the fridge is brand new and the most important feature is the dishwasher. The porch has my old dining table and chairs as well as my couch. It'll be a great spot to chill out in the summer and it's our cigar smoking room. The basement is far from set up but it has the big TV, the surround sound, and a few chairs so it's already perfect for playing vids.

Other notable features are our ever-expanding (and contracting) liquor cabinet, the heated floor in the bathroom, and my cranky cat. SB has a desktop and TV in his bedroom so technically he never has to leave but we see him around sometimes. Actually Josey is the one hiding most of the time because he put his desk down in the dungeon area of the basement next to the washer and dryer so he's normally slaving away down there but hopefully that will end when he takes his last final soon.

Click here to view the whole album.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

COD Last Night & Dammer's Trout Fry Fun

Adeclipse, Puyo, Josey and I. Along with the dynamic duo that is MyBigDumbFace and Dajuicee. Had a good time playing COD4 last night. Besides the first game I don't think we lost again. It's surprisingly more fun when you are all working together and there isn't one 14yr old kid making fart noises. Just Adeclipse breathing heavily into his mic constantly.

I'll be soaking wet at the Twins vs. Sox game tonight so I won't be on. But I hope to have some more old school KofC nights in the future where we can play some Halo, COD, or even try out some GTA multiplayer together.

That's all I got for today. But since Eternal never sent me a post about Trout Fry. And other members like me, Adeclipse and I think Pablito have never experienced it. I wanted to post Dammers wonderful narrative about his experience. Without further ado...

Trout Fry: The Experience
By DammerWillEatU

Trout Fry, an experience unlike any other! Well…not really, but kind of. Given more time and the proper planning/partying Trout Fry has loads of potential, but seeing as I was there for only 20 minutes I can’t really say that I actually had a “Trout Fry” experience. I can say I was there, and I can say it was fun, but it wasn’t what I wanted. It wasn’t what I wanted because I didn’t take Friday off. Arriving at 7:45 at night? Bad choice. It’ll be easier next year for me because I’ll have vacation hours not already spoken for that I can spend, and I fully intend to arrive early and stay late. If there is one impression I took from Trout Fry it is that only being there for 20 minutes is like licking your salted hand only to find out someone used all your lime and tequila and the bar is closing for the night. With that said, here is my experience. Buckle your seatbelts and don’t forget to put on the red and blue 3-D(ammer) glasses!

I woke up on Friday the 25th just like I woke up most days in college, with the knowledge of a forthcoming fun drinking experience helping me through the responsible parts of my day. In college it was class/practice, this last Friday it was work. Thankfully for me my day was spent as a code monkey writing Java code for a new internet application I’m building. Time flies when you’re having fun (and yes I do have fun writing code…I’m a nerd) and before I knew it the clock struck 4:00 and I was able to grab my coat and head down to my truck. It kinda sucked when I realized that in my excitement and haste I had left my cell phone, wallet, apartment keys, and truck keys still sitting in/on my desk, but hey at least I remembered them before I got outside and to my locked vehicle. A quick retrieval, an even faster drive back to my apartment, and an even faster packing of a duffel bag put me back on track and driving east to Rochester where I could meet up with my nemesis Highway 52. I call it my nemesis because I received my first speeding ticket on it when I was simply trying to get SB, Josey and I to see Blade Trinity. Welcome to Chatfield, Home of the 6 Foot Tall Asshole (I can tell you the joke in the comments if you want). At this point my hunger was getting the best of me, but in order to ensure that I wasn’t going to drink on a full stomach I purchased the minimum at the Chatfield Kwik Trip. One can of Sour Cream and Onion Pringles (Unky W. is your mouth watering?) and a bottle of Code Red later and I was back on the road. I made good time to Decorah and had arrived in town at about 7:00. I had tried calling SB, Josey, and Eternal when I was getting close but the cell phone reception at the drinking fields is poor, and thus I was forced to drive around in circles and wait for one of the drunk delivery busses. When one of the busses finally did arrive and stop at the Casey’s to gas up I asked the driver for a ride. He said no more rides, so I asked for directions. He started talking about bridges and gravel and rights and lefts, so then I asked if I could follow him and he said sure. Unfortunately gassing up a bus takes 20 minutes I guess, because by the time we headed out for the party it was 7:30 already. I was anxious to get there and tail-gating the bus out of excitement for 15 miles was possibly the most excruciating moment of the whole trip. It’s like the walk home from the bar with a hot chick (actual or perceived). You’re excited for when you get back and the longer it takes the more time there is for something horrible to happen and ruin your plans. Needless to say I arrived at the drinking fields safe and sound. Thus ends my long, nondescript, pre-drinking journey.

First impressions are important, or so they say, and the first impression I got when I arrived at Trout Fry was a good one. As I locked up my truck I watched as one of the busses almost ran over a drunken party goer. I watched someone trying to climb in the back door of the bus fall back down and get laughed at by all his friends. I saw dudes that were there for the drinking, dudes that were there more for the social atmosphere, and dudes that were there because they wanted to be considered cool and acted way drunker than they actually were because they didn’t want their soberish girlfriend to think they were lame and couldn’t get sloshed. People were walking around with large containers of beer so that is always a good sign. I proceeded to walk where I figured the party must be and after some quick searching I spied Josey moseying somewhere with a medium sized stick as only Josey can mosey. I assumed he was trying to construct a crude video or beer gaming console out of woodland materials, but instead he just wanted to roast a marshmallow (sit back down and read the rest of the story Unky W. the marshmallows in the kitchen can wait). I then saw the B’s (S and R) sitting at a picnic table, and upon entering my circle of friends I received a warm greeting from everyone. I was glad to see the Unkys Yaeger and Playboy as well as the regulars. Amerman was also a nice addition. I must admit I was amazed at and grateful for the level of sobriety everyone had. It’s hard to start drinking when everyone else is already done and gone. As I was regaled with tales of picnic tables pushed into rivers and playful otters entertaining the drinking folks, I grabbed a handle on the nearest two quart jug I could find and had my first sip of booze for the night. Sweet delicious beer flowed down my throat and I thought to myself “truly this is the drink of kings and gods alike”. After ten minutes of chatting about mud wrestling, vids, and RB’s discomfort with the weather we decided that it was quite cold outside (which it was, no doubt about it) and we would have more fun drinking back in UnkyVille. At this point I only had the equivalent of a beer or two in me so I drove the B’s back in my truck while Josey took the Unkys back in Eternal’s car. Thus ends my Trout Fry experience.

The rest of the night was pretty standard. Cases of beer were acquired, various peoples were visited, Pizza Ranch delivered, and before I knew it we had arrived at Club Scoes. I immediately participated in a chug of a Foster’s can in the “drinking corner for booze smugglers” with Eternal…I think…and then grabbed a stool at a round table to sit at for the rest of the night. Eternal was ordering and delivering the pitchers on SB’s dime, Josey was out making valuable connections with potential clients of his law practice, enticing them with offers of Creamy Dark, and the B’s were coming and going from the dance floor. Dancing Bears are truly a sight to see. At bar close we hoofed it back to UnkyVille…or got a ride….I dunno. I layed down on the couch and listened as others discussed the evening. The B’s took to the UnkyVille Cave, which makes sense considering they’re bears, and Josey was sowing his seed in Kip’s bed with some yet to be facebook poached chick. In my opinion, I think everyone got out of the evening what they wanted. As I drifted into a dreamless sleep thoughts of Family Table breakfast rushed through my head, and thus ended my brief re-entry into the college party scene.

At daybreak the next day everyone was roused from their slumber and we hopped into Pete’s car for some delicious Family Table. I ordered the biscuits and gravy with a side of bacon and some mozzarella sticks (fine Unky W. you can go get some food I’ll wait....................................). Each person at the table ordered a shake and the waitress was visibly irritated. Breakfast conversation centered around Eternal’s uneasiness with the female queef, which is a post topic for another day, and amazingly not a single mention of Josey’s bedroom exploits from the night before were uttered (I beg of you Josey, please give details on what transpired). After Family Table, Josey and the B’s took to the road and went back home. I’m currently also hoping that SB will give an update on his house moving experience. The rest of my day was pure bliss. Eternal and I purchased Apocalypto and American Gangster from Movie Gallery. I was very pleased with Apocalypto, and after that finished we proceeded to watch the movie Jaws. By the time Jaws ended hunger pangs were hitting so Eternal, Yaeger, and I went to Great Dragon for some delicious Chinese buffet. I spent most of my time consuming the crab rangoon and rice with general tso’s or sesame chicken on top. Following GD it was time for video games, with Star Wars Battlefront and Big Bumpin filling time. There was a small amount of COD played as well, but since that isn’t split screen it isn’t very much fun for the group setting. By now my brother had arrived, back from his track meet, and we proceeded to consume beers and play vids. After the partying in the various cluster rooms had died down a little (about the time everyone went to the bar) the Unkys Yaeger, Playboy, and Eternal played Halo 1 with Amerman, my brother and I. The team of Yaeger, Playboy, and Amerman outplayed Eternal, my brother, and I averaging a 15 kill victory in most games to 50. My play quality increased each game however and I again became accustomed to fall damage and actually having to precisely aim. At the end of the night I grabbed my duffel and followed my brother back to his dorm room for a restful night’s sleep. The next morning I again took to the road and made the journey to my parent’s house. On the way I remembered that I had left American Gangster in UnkyVille. (Eternal that can be yours to keep, I’ll just buy it here.) Thus ended my weekend. I think Barry Badrinath says it best when bouncing quarters off the hood of the Von Wolfhaus brothers’ car, the trip was definitely “just like college” well worth it. Hell, the food alone was worth the trip.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Clan Challenge - Outcast Reborn

So I haven't check the KofC mail box in a while and with nothing going on in the KofC community these days except Squatting Bear's kickass new TV and the even more kickass party where I can see the new kickass TV. Kickass.

Back to the email. We have one new message in the last couple months since we were forced to change names. I'll never forgive you, Joseph A. Niglio. The following email came about 2 weeks ago.

Hello I am OcR Hurricane from Outcast Reborn.

I would like to know if your clan would like to do a friendly match on Halo 3

How does Sunday, May 18th at 8 eastern time

6 v 6

best of 5; you choose 3 we choose 2

I can either be contacted via this email or on our forums which is

I look forward to hearing back from you guys!
Well I'll give the Outcast Reborn clan mad props for being super polite. If I would have challenged their clan it would have been more like this.
What's up fuckfaces,

You bitches wanna lose?
Anywho, I haven't played Halo in a while so if anyones wants to play these guys I say go for it. I wouldn't mind playing them at a later date if anyone wants to get back into the Halo swing of things?

Check out their website as it kicks our sites ass in the flashy category. If you are into that sort of thing.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Housewarming Party

I just bought my plane ticket so it better be happening. Make sure you RSVP in the comments section.

I was going to just leave it at that for today's post because a) I'm lazy and b) the story I am going to tell isn't really that good.

It all happened on Saturday night. I went to a bar called Wrigleyville North. It's about a block from my house and it's always a good place to get cheap drinks and watch/listen to some live music.

Some funny stuff happened while I was there. Two cops drove these three slutty girls to the bar in the back of the cop car. They got out and went into the bar, but the dude at the door wouldn't let them in because he thought it was a set up and one of the girls seemed absolutely smashed. Eventually they let them in but the one girl was not allowed to drink. She just laid her head on the bar while the other two girls danced around to the music.

It was probably around 2am and I needed to use the facilities, so I walked across the bar to the bathroom. It's a larger bathroom (which is funny because it's a tiny bar) so when I couldn't get the door open I knew it wasn't just simply locked. I gave it another good push and could feel the door give way enough to see that someone was leaning against it. Being pretty drunk and having to pee real bad I gave it another push and eventually squeezed in to the room.

Two dudes where in there. Not sure if they were doing a line of coke, or just playing "If you show me yours, I'll show you mine." But either way they didn't want me in there. Being completely oblivious, I stand up next to the urinal and start to relieve myself.

Here is where it went downhill. As I am standing there I say to the two sketchy characters, "What were you too fools doing in here that you didn't want any company" or something to that effect. I distinctly remember the word fool in my questions, because shortly after I posed the question, one of the dudes said, "Who you calling a fool?" and decided to punch me square in the eye as I was standing there with my pants down.

I saw a flash of light when it hit me and I feel back a bit. Amazingly I didn't pee on myself and re-buttoned my jeans. (I didn't zip up my fly, there wasn't enough time) I was obviously surprised. The other non-punching dude was holding the other guy back as I tried to weigh my options. I didn't really want to get my ass kicked by two guys in the bathroom but I alway didn't want to just let this guy punch me. Also, from hearing about drunken bar fights in court often end up getting their cases thrown out and I wasn't sure of the extend of the damage to my eye. (turns out besides redness and a little bit of soreness nothing happened with it... what a pussy)

I (briskly) walked out of the bathroom to tell my party what just transpired and just as they tell me I should get his name, I see the dude that punched me sprint out of the bar. The funny part is that the other dude in the bathroom started telling the bartender and bouncer that I just walked into the bathroom and started hitting them. Either way, we left the bar after that and I woke up with a little bit of soreness but nothing that bad.

So a reminder to all of the KofC members Publish Post, when some dudes are holding the bathroom door shut, just try and hold it a bit longer.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Squatting Bear IS up before 9 AM. PROOF!

To Funny To Not Share

Saw this on Conan last night. I laughed pretty hard at the time, it's got to be one of the funnier GTA pieces I have seen.

Well, except this of course:

Other GTA Stuff Info Dump:
- Google Maps has a GTA map where can people can put easter eggs, missions and locations and you can do everything just like in regular Google maps, except no satellite images... yet.

- Adam Sessler from X-Play and other various ZDTV and G4TV fame talks to NPR about Grand Theft Auto IV on Talk of the Nation.... and you-know-who calls in. Recordings of the program can be found here. Make sure you listen to it all the way to the end.

- A funny clip and some other information about the Media Universe of GTA IV.

Quick 3 Part Rant:
Nothing pisses me off more than people that are completely oblivious to the other human beings around them. Three things that really piss me off that have a common theme with people on the right and left. Confused? Well you will see what I mean.

Number One: Morons that drive in the left lane. If it's a two lane highway/interstate don't drive in the left lane. Move over to the right unless you are passing someone. If you are constantly passing people 1/2 mph faster than the person on the right, and you see someone going faster than you coming up behind you, you should move over to the right as soon as you get by them. And if you are feeling generous speed up enough to pass them in the next few miles. Just because you are going 72 in a 70mph zone does not mean you can "drive in the fast lane."

Second, people that fucking stand on the escalators, either in the middle or on the left side. Unless you have luggage, are pregnant or old, or a combination of the three you should probably just take the 3 steps it takes to get up the escalator anyway. But when 300 people are trying to get to work before the clock strikes nine you should probably at least move to the right side so people can pass you. How unaware do you have to be when you see a line of people behind when there is nothing but empty steps ahead of you. (This obviously only applies when it's a very busy escalator)

Third, move your ass to the inside of the seat on public transportation (could be the left or right side depending on what side of the bus/train you are on). It's not the end of the world to sit with someone on the train. It's going to happen. You can't try to avoid eye contact for the entire ride but instead, just move your fat ass to the inside so the elderly woman can sit down.

God damn, I am so angry right now. Thank god it's Friday. Anyone have any plans?