Sunday, October 21, 2007

Needing to find a match, Unky heads to desert.

After weeks of searching online for an adequate challenger, Unky just couldn't find anyone capable of battling Josey and himself in an Unky (warthog) war. With his precision driving and Josey's excellent gunmanship they were able to withstand any challengers.

But Unky is always hungry. In fact, it is rumored that he defeated fellow blogger, Squatting Bear, by eating 13 corn dogs in one sitting, so he traveled to Africa to confront his namesake: an actual warthog. Phacochoerus africanus, as it is called scientifically, weighs up to 330 pounds with 9 inch canines, and can run at a speed of 30mph.

While this is no doubt impressive for the two-tusked beast, it pales in comparison to the maximum Halo 3 Warthog speed of 78 mph, or the more important maximum Unky-speed of 88 mph (when Josey directs him to sweet jumps).
As expected, Unky Warthog splattered the warthog, leaving it and its young hoglets whimpering as Unky sped off into the distance. Meanwhile, Josey jumped out of the hog and finished off the hog by B-Buttoning it with his forged rifle.


Josey WaIes said...

It was a great hunt. The meat was so good. I do miss the sweet jumps Unky as you know, I am a big fan of sweet jumps. The new mini bike squatting bear bought has not been taken off any yet, but it will soon I am sure.

Also for real we should all go on a warthog hunt, tere are some states that have them, or what is close to a real afircan warthog, and we should all go and kill some.

Daymonster said...

haha, if this happens (the warthog hunt) it must be documented and put on the site.

Also, I thought you went off a sweet jump and thats how you smashed the front? This should also be documented.

Josey WaIes said...

The warthog hunt should happen, and yes it should be taped, people tape hunts all the time now thats not a big deal.

I ran the minibike into a wall because it does not turn, I have yet to destroy it or myself from taking it off sweet jumps. All in good time.